I'm back!

Not just back to the blog, but back from the painful place my marriage and its end took me to.

A lot of time has passed and I have a whole notebook full of recipes.

Endings and Beginings.

So as you all know Adam left me in January but we carried on living together until late March when I discovered some things that made that situation untenable. Since then I've been desperately trying to save my marriage and to "save" Adam from himself as I saw it. I had plenty of advice from people telling me to move on and the majority was kindly meant but I wasn't able to move on until I was convinced I'd fought for the man I (still) love. However, yesterday we went for our last counselling session and things changed for me.

Adam was very reluctant but came because I asked him to do that for me. He knew it would be painful and he was right, it was one of the most difficult experiences of my life but it was hugely cathartic and extremely valuable. I was able to try one last time to make Adam see my point of view and what I thought should, or could happen and he was able to tell me why it just won't. I still think he's wrong and am very sad about it but I've done all I can and I have to let him live his own life and make his own mistakes. I just pray they won't be of the same scale as what he has done to me.

I feel ready to start moving on now. I've got plenty of hard work ahead of me and I need to grieve and rebuild my life but I can START that process now. I'm going to need lots of help. I want to meet new people and do new things. I'm not looking to find love, just peace.

Wish me luck.

Wireless!

Hurrah!
I'm delighted to say that we now have a wireless network here at no.69 which means I can write on here without depriving The Boy of his beloved internet. Expect more postings and musings in the weeks to come.

Spanish Potatoes

This isn't really a recipe but it's a dish my sister Elizabeth made for me when I was staying with her in Norfolk a few weeks ago. She made it in a lovely Spanish Terracotta dish, I had to use Pyrex!

Heat the oven to about 200 degrees.

Finely slice some floury potatoes, I use Desiree. I'm no longer afraid of my mandolin (despite slicing my thumb on New Year's Eve) so I use the widest setting on that. Layer them in a medium shallow dish with finely sliced onions and some cherry tomatoes cut length ways into quarters. Season with salt and pepper as you go. Put in a good glug of olive oil and a cup of water and cook in the oven til the potatoes are soft and there's a delicious gravy at the bottom.

You can serve these as a main dish with a green salad, something strong like rocket or watercress would be ideal or use it as a side with meat or fish. It's especially good with chops as the integral gravy stops the meal being too dry but Elizabeth popped some (ethical, line-caught) cod from The North Norfolk Fish Company (where she worked til last October) on the top ten minutes before it was ready.

Lily-Lo Cosmetics

I have trouble finding good foundations and concealers due to a variety of reasons.

1. I have very pale "cold-toned" skin and most cosmetics in this country are too peachy or creamy coloured.
2. I have incredibly sensitive skin that is allergic to a vast array of random things.
3. I have very dry skin that is prone to flaking, make-up makes it look worse.
4. I can't use Lancome, Maybelline or The Body Shop as they are all at least part-owned by Nestle.

So imagine my delight when Amy recommended Lily-Lo cosmetics. They're a small, independent company that does mineral cosmetics. They have the best colour matches I've ever seen, their concealer is miraculous, it lasts for ever and is easy to use. It doesn't irritate my skin as it's full of natural minerals and low on nasty stuff, in fact it qualifies for entry in the Green Beauty Bible. They sell samples on their website so you can get your match right. A little goes a long, long way. And their service is just amazing. I ordered some yesterday about lunchtime and it arrived this morning. I know they're in the same county as me, but even so...

I cannot recommend this highly enough, order a sample I promise you will be absolutely delighted.

Lily-Lo Cosmetics.

Spring

It really feels Spring-like today, it's cold but sunny but more to the point I feel happy. I'm still having a difficult time of it, sharing the house with my ex means it's impossible to move on properly and he's having trouble understanding what the boundaries are. He sailed into my room this morning looking for a shirt before I was even dressed. Actually sailed implies calm, stormed is probably more correct. (It wasn't in my room, of course, it was in the laundry pile downstairs where he'd left it). He rings me to tell me what he's doing socially and to ask if it's ok that he goes out. I guess it's good that he's attempting to be considerate but his social life is really none of my business- a fact made very clear by the majority of his friends who have ceased all communication with me.

I'm off into town later to get a wireless router as I'm fed-up with having to ask if he could possibly stop playing Magic On-line so that I can spend a few minutes on the computer.

What's in a name?

Ok, so I stumbled on this site that claims it can deduce your character from your name. How is that possible? Your name is given to you by your parents for all sorts of reasons, your character is unlikely to be one of them.
Anyway, mine is clearly nonsense. Prudent? Business acumen? Yeah, right...

NATASHA-You tend to be critical of yourself, not always expressing your true desires. You have an interest in health and health matters. You have much enthusiasm with a driving attitude toward achievement in life. Your privacy is important to you. You have a rich inner life. You have a need to be up front. You try to be prudent. You have good business acumen. You work hard to achieve material success through your own efforts.

What does your name mean?